HOW DO I?
How do I loose “Pirates of the Caribbean Scene It” to my brother-in-law, who didn’t even know the “pretty boy” who plays Will Turner? (I’m the piratemom dammit!)
How do I explain to the Pier One staff that I’m looking for decorative sticks that look “Tim Burton-ish”?
How do I have a “nice weekend” like the bank teller told me to, after just learning that we bounced six checks?
How do I burn down an extra house down without getting caught?
How do I stop myself from strangling my husband with the Wii power cord because he gets to play for hours when I am painting, cleaning, etc…?
How do I write a letter to Johnny Depp asking for my money back for “Sweeny Tod” plus nacho?
How do I put up with my tweenage son who has been taught to disrespect me, without drugs?
How do I tell crazy old guy at the Y to back off without being bitchy?
How do I spellcheck on blog.com because I am sick of reading my own blog ten times for spelling errors? (Yes, sister, some of us need that spell/grammer check)
Sweeney Todd (spell check wouldn’t have helped here) was a fine film. The nachos however, WERE pretty sucktastic. I’d be interested in how the local news would cover the wii strangling…and…you could always dispose of the body in the extra house.
Oh yeah, you compose and spell check in word, and then you copy your text into a blog post.